8 Star Wars Characters Applied For A Mortgage And Received These Hilarious (But Fair) Responses

We’re huge Star Wars fans here at L&C. So you can imagine our surprise and delight when our colleagues from our Galactic Division found some very interesting mortgage correspondence letters in their archives.

Due to client confidentiality, we’re unable to tell you the names of the recipients, the addresses they were sent to or even when they were sent. All we can tell you is that the below letters are from a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

What we can show you is the contents of these letters, which detail the reasons why their mortgage was either accepted or rejected based on lending criteria.

Some were successful, and went on to enjoy their new homes… for a time at least.

Others, unfortunately, were declined for a variety of different reasons – including involvement in black market activities and a history of unfortunate circumstances.

All of the reasons for approving and declining each application can be found below. Do you agree with the assessments?

luke skywalker


Darth Vader


Master Yoda


Han Solo


chewbacca


boba fett


jabba the hutt


Princess Leia



Letter Content:

Dear Mr S.....
Thank you for your recent mortgage application.

I regret to inform you that we will not be able to lend on this occasion.

Whilst we are always keen to help first time buyers onto the property ladder, we must ensure our lending is responsible.

In your case the combination of no deposit, no discernible source of income and an address history that may be described as “murky” at best, means we are unable to lend with confidence at this time.

Perhaps if you had a parent able to stand as guarantor we may be able to review the situation.

Yours sincerely

Head of Lending
L&C Galactic Division

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Dear Mr V....

Thank you for your recent mortgage application.

I am delighted to inform you that your application has been accepted and enclose herein our formal mortgage offer.

I would draw your attention to section 5 of the Special Conditions regarding insurance: the security property (“a vast, artificial planet of death”) is a potential fire risk and our surveyor noted at least one major structural flaw.

We therefore require sight of your insurance documents prior to completion, and of course would be happy to provide a competitive quotation.

Yours sincerely

Head of Lending
L&C Galactic Division

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Dear Mr Y...
Thank you for your recent mortgage application.

I write to inform you that your application has been declined.

The security address listed as a “quasi-religious refuge” falls outside our lending policy.

I would further add that your idiosyncratic approach to the application form did not help your cause, and I would urge you to take a more conventional approach in future.

However, in order to make ourselves clear to you, our final decision is as follows: Rent or rent not, there is no buy.

Yours sincerely

Head of Lending
L&C Galactic Division

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Dear Mr S...

Thank you for your recent mortgage application.

We noted a significant discrepancy between your stated earnings (the source of which is less than clear) and those shown on your tax returns.

Frankly we suspect you of participating in black market activities – criminal behaviour in itself – and I feel it is incumbent upon me to point out that non-declaration of taxes may be tantamount to fraud.

Therefore, I must inform you that your application has been declined.

However, if you would like to put your tax arrangements on a clearer - though no less efficient - footing, I should be happy to arrange an interview with one of our specialists.

Yours sincerely
Head of Lending
L&C Galactic Division

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Mr C... B....
Sir, Snarling, waving weapons and otherwise attempting to intimidate branch staff not only will hinder you from obtaining a mortgage but will, if repeated, lead to criminal proceedings against you.

Yours sincerely
Head of Lending
L&C Galactic Division 

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Dear Mr F...

Thank you for your recent mortgage application.

I am pleased to inform you we are minded to accept your application.

However, as a condition we will need to see further detail regarding your income.

You describe yourself as a “contractor” but declined to give further information on the grounds of “client confidentiality”. I’m afraid we must insist on seeing copies of all contracts in the last 3 years along with a detailed account of work carried out and income received. We need this in order to confirm that this income is sustainable in the future.

I trust you will be able to provide this information at your earliest convenience and look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely

Head of Lending
L&C Galactic Division
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Dear Mr T.. H...,

Thank you for your recent mortgage application.

We have reviewed your request carefully and I am pleased to inform you that we will be able to lend on the terms requested.

We note your offer of additional collateral in the form of “the frozen bodies of my enemies, and bejewelled slave maidens” with interest. Whilst unconventional and, I am sure, entirely unnecessary, our Board of Directors would be eager to discuss it further at your earliest convenience.

Yours sincerely

Head of Lending
L&C Galactic Division

PS. Have you considered life insurance? We are able to offer comprehensive policies at extremely competitive rates.


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Your Royal Highness,

Thank you for your recent mortgage application.

Whilst we would be honoured and privileged to assist your home purchase, unfortunately your royal status would make it impossible for us to recoup any losses, should something unforeseen occur.

Indeed, as a high-profile individual with a history of unfortunate occurrences already, our Credit & Risk officers have greater concern about something entirely foreseen.

It is therefore with deepest regret that I must inform you we will be unable to help on this occasion.

Yours sincerely

Head of Lending
L&C Galactic Division

PS. Have you considered life insurance? We are able to offer comprehensive policies at extremely competitive rates.
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